Is YOUR energy gone? Or is your health deteriorating?
Have you hit YOUR emotional limit? Are you angry, sad, guilt ridden?
Have you abandoned yourself by giving away your power?
Are you just surviving?
As codependents our egos are what keep us in survival mode. As dysfunctional as it is, it is survival.
Everyone has their own set of truths/reality. The addict’s truth/reality is skewed by the effects their addiction has on their brains. As codependents, our truth/reality is skewed by the brain of the addict plus the dysfunction of our lives before the age of 7. This forces your interpretation of events, perspective of situations and expectations of people to be skewed.
That’s where your subconscious comes in. It keeps track of the coping strategies you learned as a child. Wise beyond your years, you understood and implemented these strategies. Strategies to keep others safe from themselves; to keep the peace. Then you took these strategies into your adult relationships. It is YOUR normal.
As a codependent you may have noticed that you attract the same type of person again and again. We’re drawn to the familiar. We unknowingly expect things to be different this time. We think our strategies will work this time.
We put up walls around ourselves. We wear masks. No one, even ourselves, know who we truly are. What we're truly capable of.
By becoming aware of what it means to be codependent; acknowledging how far back in your life it's seeded you take the all important first step in YOUR recovery. Yes, YOUR recovery.
The second step is to put your ego aside. You need to…
- Let go of the illusion that you can fix it for them. You can’t. You never could, no matter how hard you try.
- Get out of their way and let them own the circumstances of their actions. No matter how messy it gets.
- Claim your power and find yourself for possibly the first time in your life. Who are YOU? What do YOU like? What do YOU not like?
- Make choices for YOURSELF instead living in autopilot mode.
- Honor YOUR needs. Live life by design instead of by default.
You may be asking, “How do I do that?”
You do that by taking small imperfect steps…
- Taking down the walls and setting healthy boundaries and enforcing them.
- Freeing yourself of guilt.
- Learning the power of forgiveness. Knowing that your parents did the best they knew how.
- Rewriting your life stories in empowering ways.
- Figuring out what YOU like and don’t like. Loving yourself first.
This may seem like a tall order. That's why having someone with you to help you navigate the path; someone that believes in YOU; someone who has been where you are is so important.
I believe in YOU!
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